🔥 commit-roaster

A CLI tool that roasts your terrible git commit messages.

No AI. No API keys. Just pure, hardcoded malice.

commit-roaster quietly judges your commit messages every time you run git commit in your terminal. It uses lightweight shell integration — no git hooks, no file modifications, no conflicts with Husky or pre-commit.

The commits still go through — because breaking your workflow is evil — but your ego will take a hit.

Features

• One-Command Setup: Run commit-roaster setup and you're done. Works on Bash, Zsh, Fish, and PowerShell.
• Zero Conflicts: Doesn't touch .git/hooks. Works alongside Husky, pre-commit, Lefthook, and any other hook manager.
• Fast & Local: No AI, no network dependencies, completely offline heuristic matching entirely in Go.
• Cross-Platform: Supports macOS, Linux, and Windows out of the box.
• Historical Analysis: Run stats to view an audit of your commit history's overall hygiene.
• 12 Brutal Rules: More than 140 randomly rotated roasts so you rarely get the same insult twice.

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📦 Installation

Method 1: Homebrew (macOS / Linux)

Because the tool is hosted on a custom tap, you can install it using:

brew install PranayD1807/tap/commit-roaster

Method 2: Go Install

If you already have Go installed, this is the quickest method:

go install github.com/PranayD1807/Commit-Roaster@latest

Method 3: Build from Source

git clone https://github.com/PranayD1807/Commit-Roaster.git
cd Commit-Roaster
make install

Enable Roasting (One Command!)

After installing the binary, just run:

commit-roaster setup

That's it. It auto-detects your shell (Bash, Zsh, Fish, or PowerShell), appends the integration line to the right profile file, and you're done. (How does this work?)

To fully remove it later:

commit-roaster teardown

Manual setup (advanced)

If you prefer to add the integration yourself, use commit-roaster init:

Bash & Zsh (~/.zshrc or ~/.bashrc):

eval "$(commit-roaster init)"

Fish (~/.config/fish/config.fish):

commit-roaster init fish | source

PowerShell ($PROFILE):

Invoke-Expression (&commit-roaster init powershell | Out-String)

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🚀 Usage

Wait for it to roast you organically in the terminal when committing:

$ git commit -m "update"

  🔥 commit-roaster says:
  Message: "update"

  💀 Too Short — 'update'? A commit message so short, it's basically a cry for help.
  💀 Too Vague — You might as well have written 'I did a thing' and called it a day.

  😬 Score: 6/10 — Mediocre at best.

Manual Audit Commands

1. Roast recent commits in the current repo:

# Roast the last commit
commit-roaster roast

# Roast the last 5 commits
commit-roaster roast --last 5

2. See your permanent record:

commit-roaster stats

(This command audits your entire git history in the current repository and gives you a breakdown of your commit message violations and an overall grade).

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📖 The Roast Rules

commit-roaster analyzes your subject line against 12 different heuristics:

1. Too Short (<10 chars): Let's use our words.
2. Too Vague: fix, update, stuff... Schroedinger's commits.
3. ALL CAPS: Please stop yelling at the version control tree.
4. No Verb: Must include an action (or a conventional commit prefix).
5. Profanity: Keep it PG-13, HR is watching.
6. Wall of Text: If it's over 150 characters, use the commit body instead.
7. Trailing Period: This isn't formal poetry. Stop adding periods to subject lines.
8. Ticket Only: Example: JIRA-1234. Providing zero readable context.
9. Despair / YOLO: Mentions of pray, yolo, hopefully, black magic.
10. File Name Only: E.g., src/main.js. We know what file changed. What did you do to it?
11. Exclamation Overdose: More than one exclamation point. Calm down.
12. Default Message: GitHub web edits like Update README.md or git's auto-generated merge subjects.

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🛠 Contributing

Want to make the roasts more savage? Adding new rules is incredibly easy!

1. Add your new RuleID constant in roaster/rules.go.
2. Register it in DefaultRules() and write a simple checkMyRule(msg) bool function.
3. Add 10-15 funny strings to the roastTemplates map inside roaster/roasts.go.

Running Tests

To verify the core engine and ensure no regressions involve modifying user filesystem states, run the isolated test suite locally:

go test ./... -v

Pull requests are actively encouraged!

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🚀 Publishing New Versions

This project uses GoReleaser to automate building cross-platform binaries, uploading GitHub Releases, and updating the Homebrew Tap formula.

To publish a new version:

1. Commit all your changes completely.
2. Create and push a new lightweight git tag for the version:

   git tag -a v1.0.0 -m "Release v1.0.0"
   git push origin v1.0.0

3. Run GoReleaser to automatically build and deploy:

   goreleaser release --clean

Note: You must have a GITHUB_TOKEN exported in your terminal with repo scopes for GoReleaser to successfully push the release and update the tap.

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🪪 License

MIT.

Enjoy being roasted.